Friday, April 24, 2009

The grass is always greener when they use sewage

Last summer, there was an article in the Deseret News titled 'Utah using technology, law to save water', and I have to admit, I chuckled....a lot!

The article referenced several 'government authorities' denoting concern for the fact that we need to reserve our precious stores before they dry up and yet, some of the biggest waste I see is at parks, facilities and buildings that are run by,…. you guessed it, our concerned government.

I will give them this, they are right. We’ve had many years of drought and despite the bounty of moisture this last little bit, our water index is still not way off the charts. And why? Because Utah is a desert.

People want to live in Utah pretending that it is a veritable oasis of endless lush lakes, reservoirs, streams, ponds and mountain brooks. If this were true, we would actually be in a place called Minnesota, land of ten thousand lakes or on a freeway in Seattle after a rainstorm during monsoon season.

Even though this spring (what spring???) has left us guessing as to what it would’ve been like a few weeks before Noah could’ve sailed off into a snowstorm, it’s not yet enough for the mandatory one year supply we all strive for and we are technically still living in a desert which is NOT in Seattle or Minnesota.

So that gets me to thinking, when I go by an apartment villa that is bigger than the Wasatch mountains themselves and see that the sprinklers are on in a rain storm next to the sign that says Low Utilities, Great Rates, Come on In, I am going to wonder where they got their magic wand. I'm even going to ask to borrow it so I too don't have to pay taxes to the water deity and can hopefully keep my sprinkler, shower and toilet flush bill at its lowest possible rate. That would certainly make my budgetary numbers a heck of a lot more appealing!

It also means that when I see the broken sprinkler at the city's water improvement district shooting 30 feet into the air at a rate of 13,000 gallons per second, I am going to assume that they are watering with sewage or that they subscribe to the same rule my mother taught me to live by; DO as I SAY and NOT as I DO.

Either way, sewage or archaic rules, it kinda stinks if you ask me. Now that I mention stink, that reminds me of today’s “Life Saver” which is what my dad used to tell me whenever I got bit by the green envy bug;

“If the grass on the other side of the fence is greener, then it must be all the ‘fertilizer’ they are using. Because in my humble opinion, it certainly couldn’t be the water….”

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